Monday, May 6, 2013

Lost Identity


The more I thought today about being lost,
I wondered how much of this lost feeling is
a loss of identity.

Many titles have been given "given" to me in my 40 yrs.
daughter
child
sister
preacher's kid
student
smart mouth
friend
unhappy teenager
grader
girlfriend
singer
carousel attendant
hostess
best friend
camp staffer
motherless daughter
deli worker
office worker
fiance
student teacher
bride
wife
teacher
mother
child of God
children's pastor
worshiper
griever
mentor
Phew!
Just looking at the list makes me feel blessed...
and yet at this moment I don't really know what
my identity is at this moment.

Sure,
I still am most of those names to a certain extent,
but recently several of those titles have been removed.
And because of that, I'm not quite sure???

My head knows that I am blessed.
My head knows that I am loved.
My head knows that I am saved.
My head knows that I am surrounded.

These are verbs, not nouns...
I guess I'm realizing how much of my identity comes from verbs.
I'm not quite sure if that's right or wrong,
But, it's something that I'm understanding.

So when I no longer do the things that have given me identity...
my identity is gone, lost.
SO...




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